An iPhone Crime


[via Onion]

Excerpts from an excellent article from Onion, which is supposed to be “America’s finest news source”.

WINNETKA, IL—This normally peaceful suburban town is still reeling following the news Monday that a local resident, whose name is being withheld by police pending a full investigation, left an iPhone unattended for more than three hours in a car parked in the hot sun.

“Responding to calls from concerned passersby, who observed the iPhone sitting in a vehicle … police arrived on the scene at approximately 4 p.m. and immediately intervened to save the device,” said Winnetka police chief … Security cameras have shown that the iPhone had been in the car … since 1 p.m.

… two officers … found the iPhone lying face down on the dashboard. The iPhone at first showed no signs of life, but after a tense few seconds, officers were able to wake it and get it to respond to a series of simple touch commands. Police said that if the iPhone were left in the extreme heat for any longer, it could have died.

The iPhone was rushed by ambulance to a nearby Apple facility for careful examination. Miraculously, no damage to its memory, screen, or wireless capabilities was reported.

… Hundreds of cards and letters have come streaming in, and local talk radio shows have been flooded with calls demanding that the iPhone’s owner be prosecuted. Many have come forward offering to take the iPhone into their custody, and still more have donated free downloads, ringtones, and MP3s to the victimized object.

“What kind of a human being is capable of such callous disregard for a precious, precious thing?” said one … “an iPhone is a 24-hour-a-day responsibility.”

“This iPhone was less than a year old,” said Janelle Mankewiecz, another outraged citizen. “If someone is blessed with an iPhone … they should never take their eyes off it”

“On a hot day, the temperatures inside a parked car can reach 150 degrees in just 40 minutes,” she added, looking up the information on her own iPhone.

Advertisements

One comment

  1. danialtm · October 9, 2008

    LMFAOOOO

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s